stop screwing my life

I'm totally shock cause enoch msgs me all of a sudden last nite.Asking me to meet him.He has something to tell me and i dunno what it is. He was super nice all of a sudden. He told me to take a cab down and he would pay for my cab fare.But i din go.Cause i screwed myself up cause of him once.I dun wish to do it again.Really that was the worst point of my life. I've never felt worser.But i wonder if i still do have feelings for him.I was totally cracking my brains, wondering what he wants now. Seriously whatever he wants to say he can just msg me anytime.I dun wish to see him either. I probably would screw myself up all over again.But i've got feelings for someone else.I shall stick to her.Cause i knw deep down its her to me.I think she knows cause after what sadiq told me. At least it's a start.I won't tell her anything until her o's finish and i get my life straightened out.but i really want to make a huge change in her life for the better of her.cause i love her. anyway i got bass yesterday.Finally man.I've gotten my second baby already. dame happy.Jumping for fucking joy. I got 2 tops from topman.love them man.I love collared and stripe tees. Its super nice. Okay N's are finally over.so monday after accounts paper.Went home got changed, got my stuff and was off to felly wellies place to go swimming. We tried out our bikini's.seriously i'm super flat.Hate it.Guess why?All thanks to him.I lost a inch around my waist too.Irritating much man.But itwas fun at fel's place.The highlight of that day was jumping off the board into the 3m deep pool. Super fun.On tuesday was suppose to get my bass together with Raihan(who got his guitar).But she forgot her card.So it was alrite. The guys went home to change after that.littli miss sueey(my new nickname for her) went off with them too.Hahas i love that name. So fel and me got bored just waiting for almost 2 hours.So we went to the national library.I found this book called'Twins'.I got engrossed in it.I just sat in one corner reading it while went off for her book hunt. She came back not successful with her search. So i followed fel to find a good cookbook for herself.Once it was found we went off to borrow the books.Called Hazwan asking where he was.Thank goodness he and safwan were at bugis already. So we met them outside gas haus.Waited for sadiq and han super long.All the complaints were poured onto me.Had a good conversation with Hazwan and safwan.Oh ya safwan actually thought that i liked Hazwan.So fucking random.Then diq and han came.so off to gas haus to jam. Sueey,fel and stance came after eating a good dinner.Which i sadly din have till 11 something. The room seriously sucked big time.super small and all. I'm like dame comfortable with my band members. Was totally disturbing Hazwan all the way. He is one funny guy.But fel and i have to the the conclusion that he is exactly like Seth cohen form the O.C.his got style on his own already.His goodlooking,with awesome sense of style and his one mad guy. maybe i've got the hots for him.But his just my bandmember and a friend to me. After that Went home.took a bus with sadiq.the rest took MRT home.so i told sadiq all the complaints that were poured onto me. After that at home just pigged out.so thats life till today.i'm on a daybreak today.tmr is back to felly wellies place.So emo punk never dies.*rabbit*